It's been a mth plus since i last updated liaos. Well, been trying hard to cut down on my drinking and pubbing alr. Anyway, my significant 'someone' found himself a new gal. As for me, i've gotten a new guy afta two mths plus. Finally, i decided to move on lerrs. No point holding onto something that aint meant to be mine. Recently de life v chaotic. Luckily for me, my family are always ard. My friends have been supporting me too. Thx to all peers out there~ Actually the reason why i wanna update blog is simply bcos there are sooooo many things i've been kiping inside me..
Yupps. It's indeed true i still haven completely let go of 'him'. Told ya i need time. Don force me to say things out when i dun feel like it. You asked if i feel guilty towards you. All i can say is that i'm afraid. I mean all the things i said. Including the things i said that day at KeeHan's hse de staircase. You're a gd bf. For this, i swear. I've been hurt once. Deeply. I dun wanna get hurt anymor. This is the reason why i'm afraid. I no longer trust. Not only to you. Get it mahs? So many things i wanna say. But i cant jux show you my true self yet. I need time to overcome. To accustome to yor life, yor style. I know yor frens dun hv a gd impression of me. That's bcos they dunno me well. Dun tell me you still dun understand me the least bit by now? I'm stressed up. I mean it. I no longer wan ppl to think i'm weak liaos. You dunno me that well. So you cant see how drastic i've changed. I dun wish to shun from problems. I jux dun hv the courage to face it. I may appear strong. Yahs. That is only to ppl who dunno me well. Sigh, jux rmb i'm trying hard. I've got many things to fan over. My family, yor family, my friends, yor friends, etc. ur world is so diff. Think over what i've once said to you. The things i said at blk5 when we're alone. We live by faith, not by sight. See things through yor heart, not by yor eyes only~
Say sooo much, 'you' understand mahs? Not that i dun wanna tell you directly. Jux dunno how to say. Sigh... Hope you really do understand the things i'm expressing. I will stand by the promises i gave you. Not gonna say goodbye easily de.
-JUST GIVE ME SOME TIME-
[Jerica]
0520am
Finally updated my blog again.. Nothing much to say also. My life sucks since 20thAPR07'.. EVeryday just drink and drink. Eat anything also just puke. Haahs. FUnny sial. The more i drink, the emptier i feel. This kinda life is killing me. I miss him.. Too much. I know he's leading a happier life without me. Since that day i made the decision to end it all, i should be prepared. Prepared for all these kinda crappy miseries. Today's the 2nd month we broke up lerrs. And i'm not feeling any better. It's tiring to smile when you don feel the least like it. Someone told me, it's better for both of us this way. I'm living in self denial can.. Telling myself i'll be happy as long as he's happy. I DON WANNA BE 'NOBLE' anymore!!! It simply sucks. All i really wann is just him and only him... I've tried, but i cant let go. Stupid me.. I'm a fool. Living in my own world. Avoiding the sun as much as i can. If tears can make his shadows fade away, i'd rather keep crying. So so much to say to him, but i know there's no point anymore. I can only just wait.. COntinue waiting for as long as i can bahs. Till the end, i promised. I shall stand by my promises. It may sound boring to those ppl reading my blog. Haahs. Sorry yahs. I've got not much mood to describe my recent life. Cos everyday just drink and get drunk. Except for ytd nahs. COs broke up de 2nd month mahs. Felt so empty drinking.. HUrts like hell can.. It does. I'm still loving someone. Hoping to return to the old days.. Perhaps the more it hurts, the more you love bahs.. Feel like a fool. Haahs. Seeing him post pictures of other gals in his friendster and i'm still here waiting like a fool.. No matter how, i'm just tired of relationships. Just nv get tired of him. Lols.. GOnna stop here le i guess.. Peers out there, thanks for your concern. I'm fine. Really. Just let me indulge in drinking for now bahs. Period.
-ALCOHOLIC JERICA-
[SADNESS IS BEAUTIFUL; LONELINESS IS TRAGICAL..]
Finally.. Got time to update blog liaos. Many things happened lahs. But it's always the same old damn thing. Yups. Broke up with 'him' again. As usual. Hahs.. Dunno lahs. Very luan now. I know he enjoys his single life now. Good ma. Both of us got freedom liaos. No point saying so much now. I guess ppl out there als sians of my story with him liaos. Hahs.. Anyway, nicole found her xing fu liaos. CONGRATS LOR!! Hehs.. Hoping my precious ANN can find hers too.. FASTER FASTER!!!! Anyway, going to get a job in pub.. Wanna put tattoos too! Work hard bahs. I wann get bike license too! SAPPHIRE!! Buck up k? Then we both go rounding together! Crystal shall sit in her hubby's car. =x K lahs. Hands tired liaos. Take care everyone!
To 'him': I dunno since when, both of us began to hurt each other. Perhaps you're right. With love comes hatred.. No matter how, jia you. With or without me... You'll be fine de. I'll still be around when you needs me. Just that, this time round, i'll be a friend. Take good care k? I shall keep you and our memories deep down in my heart. Every single thing.. Thanks for the times we spent together. I was showered with your love. I was blessed. Let's just say that i dunno how to treasure bahs.
MEMORIES________090206-110507
Hmmm... Kinda long nv post liaos. Hahs, sorry peers out there.. Been busy with my boy (as usual).. Well, shall blog about my trip to Taiwan first. Heh, it was fun with my boy with me. Went to their museums and night market. Went shopping with my dear. But hors, the things there not cheap ar~ Hahas. The first day we got there, it was kinda late liaos. So, we jux took a rest in the hotel. But, my boy and i sneaked out to buy Ciggys. Then we tried their cup noodles. Haha. Their things in the 7-11 v cheap lors! A pack of ciggys only $2.50 sing dollar. We strolled for a while then go back liaos. Excuse me, it's like bloody cold and there aren't lots of ppl out there. Due to CNY period. Reached hotel then take a bath in their bathtub. Too small. Only for one person =x Hahs.. After bathing, ate our supper. Their tv channels hors, damn lots lor! Got dunno around 30 plus channels. Watched till we fell aslp. Nx morn, woke up damn early to go their famous pier. Soooo many food!! And we went to their LOVER's BRIDGE!!! Damn nice lahs! Took some pics. Hmmm.. Then we went to some weird weird place for lunch. DUring the stay there, all we had was those restaurant food. Deardear kip complaining he got fatter (Dun worry lahs, how fat i also want you derrs!) Hahs.. After lunch went to some other places lo.. Then late at night, went to 7-11 with dear again. Cup noodles lo, wad else.. Hehs. But with my precious around, everything seems so meaningful! =x I shall cut short abt the trip kaeS? During the second last day, went to a damn damn exquisite restaurant for dinner. Food damn nice, ambience damn good. Love it! Then went to nearby shopping mall.. Got Ferris Wheel!! Too bad the queue tooooo long liaos. Managed to take pics.. Heng ar.. Went back hotel then we played bath foam. Hehs.. Deardear helped mi run the water and put the bath foam derrs!! Sweet hors? After tat went to 7-11 AGAIN.. But this time round, my boy said he wants the most expensive cup noodles as it's our last night lerrs. And so, we bought three cups. When we reached the hotel, we were damn hungry. My boy went bathing and i cooked the noodles. Damn funny lahs!! His noodles looked sooooo nice with meat and all those. But when finished cooking, it was damn disgusting! To think that deardear still boast to me! HAHAHAHA! My silly boy.. So ke ai lahs him.. Anyway, last day went to cut our hair~ Their service damn good but skills damn bad.. Hais.. Cut short lahs. Overall, this trip with deardear shall be kept in my heart always! Love him..
Hais.. Back to the present. My precious is leaving S'pore for Genting tmr.. Sad.. Three days cant contact him. Maybe it's because i see him everyday bahs.. Hais.. Should have nv taken our time together for granted.. See la? Now he going NS soon also. Just hope that no matter wad happens, we can survive the NS period lo.. Cos i really love him real damn much! Nowadays he's been treating me sweetly too.. Must remind myself not to take him for granted. Must find job faster. Then can treat him better... Pray hard that we can be like David and Jacq.. K lahs, wann go his sch accompany him eat lunch.. Byes...
*PHLYC*
JeRiCa_DiaMonD
1024am
Woah Woah Woah!!! It's been almost two weeks plus since we last updated our blog. Cannot let the spider web grow and grow worx.. Dunno where to start cos too many things are happening in my life recently. Had many first time experience.. Went to Mustafa sial! I know i Know.. People mux be laughing at miiee. Cos i've nv been there b4. Went there with my beloved, david and jac and tobi.. The things there ar, damn cheap lahs! HaHaS.. But also got one kinda smell. We walked inside there ar, i nearly vommitted. Not racist ar.. Jux that think is thier perfume smell too strong liaos. Then another time, we went to see car racing. But this time, without jac.. Replaced with my ah mei (teck hua).. LolS!! We waited there for dunno how long only saw those cars that came to race, but nv saw them racing. SianS right? Yups. Then we went up to Fort Canning Park. Turtle lors. Damn eerie lahs. We went up a while we go off liaos. Luckily got car.. Cos damn tired lerrs. Hmmm.. Brought Gomez for grooming. I tell yUu ar, beta dun bring yOr pets to holland de pet shop. Knn. Cut until gomez de nails all bleeding. Fcuk. Heart pain sial!! But other than that, think thier grooming quite ok lahs. Hey, that's the first time i walked around Holland Village too! I'm a mountain tortise lahs. HehS.. But thanks to my beloved, i've gained a lot of experience. Hais. Had a long talk with my boy ytd. Realized a lot a lot of things. Maybe all along, my character remains the same bahs. I dunno if i should be sad or glad that my boy is thinking this way. Right now, i just know that i miss my family and friends. Misses the old days. This yr de chinese new year i will be away to Taiwan. Cant have reunion dinner with my family!! I'm so upset lahs. Thinking of not wanting to go. But i cant. Cos the whole trip is like damn expensive lahs. & my boy de parents pay liaos. I'm so worried about my family that i dun wish to go. On the other hand, i wanna have memories with my boy that nobody has.. Hais.. In a dilemma now.. Type so long, hand tired liaos. I wann go fetch my boy from sch also. So long, everyone!
1115am
'JeRiCa_DiaMonD
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
hey i saw that rainbow with ben inside his car too =D
finally you know how to think a little =x
anyway.. its good to hear that.. but my same words apply... your actions should speak louder then your words.. =)
actually intend to ask you for mahjong tomorrow cause tomorrow i going alexandra to return the pass and all.. but seems like you're working and busy with you things then i think next time then... when i'm free i'll go find you ya =)
take care... hugs
crystal =D
It's the first day of the new year!! Saw a rainbow sial! HaHas.. Good year ahead hors? Saw it with my boy and his family.. Hmmm.. Resolutions for this year will be to earn loads and loads of money!! Then my family can enjoy.. Hope this year will be smooth sailing bahs. Don wann anymore troubles like last year liaos. I wann to enjoy my trip to taiwan!! &.. I sincerely hope that all bitches can get outta my life. Stop bothering my boy and i anymore. WahahahaS~ Anyway, may everyone out there have a great great year!!
=)
'JeRiCa_DiaMonD
1942pm
Wah.. Nowadays kip working and working. No time to update. Well, working at chinatown point de boutique. So sian lahs. No customer derrs. Nothing to do there, bloody cold also. But nvm lahs. Work got money liaos can bring grandpa to hospital, return my crystal her money, bring my family out, etc.. Hmmm.. Sounds good to miiee. =) So peers out there, don jio miiee out or asking for a meet-up now hors. Cos i'd be too busy! Unless yUu ppl wann come chinatown point look for miiee lahs. Second storey. The shop name is 'HOMY' wors. KeKex.. By the way, new year eve gg sing k. Anybody interested drop miiee a msg in friendster bahs. K lahs. Going to work soon. Tc everyone!!
'JeRiCa_DiaMonD
1144am
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